I went to a lovely house warming party. We all had a lovely time, chatting and laughing away. One of the guys there, had recently broken up with his girlfriend. That is all well and good, those things happen. What shocked me though, is that it didn’t seem like he actually understood the pain he caused his ex girlfriend. I understood from her that she did tell him, but it still doesn’t look like he really has a clue.
This to me, is just a very sad end to a good romance. If I had to pick sides, I would definitely opt to sympathise more with him. She obviously hurts more, because she invested a lot more in the relationship. She decided to put herself out there, despite all her previous bad relationships and will recover and try again at a later stage.
He, on the other hand will remain emotionally unattached and never experience the joy and fulfilment of loosing himself in somebody else’s embrace. He will just move on to the next woman who wants to “rescue” him and then reject her again when she starts to cramp his style.
Although I understand the subconscious addiction to co-dependancy relationships, it still confuses me at times. If someone is good to you and she wants to love you, why not accept it and love her back? Life would be so simple then. We would all be happy and content. Yes, I know things happen in our lives that mess us up emotionally, but there are so much that can be done, to cure all of that.
The first step to solving a problem is to admit that there is one. The only way to find the problem is by doing serious introspection. You are the only person that can make yourself happy. You have to be honest. When things fall apart and you hurt your loved one, you can not expect them to just carry on as if nothing happened.